Let me preface this post by saying that allergy parents are the best. If you think parenting is hard, imagine how hard parenting an allergic child must be. Us allergy kiddos don’t make it easy either; we can be moody, we can be picky when we shouldn’t be, and we don’t like our allergies to be the focus of e-v-e-r-y-thing!
Now for the I-was-an-allergy-kid-once real talk. Parents, it is ok for your child to be the only one not eating cake at the birthday party once in a while.
Why it’s ok to be left out
Lately, I’ve had some serious smoothie envy. I have OAS, which means I can’t eat a lot of raw fruit and veggies. I also have a tree nut allergy. This means going to the local juicery for an epic smoothie is just not possible. There have been many occasions where I would be staring at my hubby’s beautiful smoothies and could feel my whole face turn green with envy. But I deal with it, remind myself you can’t have everything, have a few grumpy minutes, and move on. It’s only food after all, and I can make my own green smoothie at home!
What I’m saying is your kid is going to experience a lot of times in their life where they won’t be able to do something because of their allergies. That’s just the reality of food allergies. Sometimes a night out isn’t possible because the bar everyone wants to go has peanut shells all over the ground, or you can’t try the hot new food trend because it’s all based on eating legumes, or your friend has a birthday party, and the cake contains almond.
We have to learn that because of our allergies we need to be flexible and it’s ok not to participate in everything. I can’t even begin to count the number of times I’ve gone out to eat with friends and just had a drink. You need to protect your kids from feeling left out, but you also need to prepare them for those times where they won’t be able to join in – giving them the tools to be ok as a bystander. Trust me these moments come up a lot when your an adult.
I see all the amazing things allergy parents do and can only admire the love you have for your kids. Who knows, I may be an allergy parent one day too and will be taking a page out of all your books. ☺️ From one allergy kid to an allergy parent we appreciate what you do, and it’s important to let us learn that our allergies mean we may need to sit out the next round.
Kortney is your typical atopic triad! She manages asthma, eczema, environmental and food allergies. Kortney is a co-creator of the online community Allergy Travels and co-host of The Itch Podcast. She wants to spread joy in a community that can easily see the hard side of life with atopic disease and believes that you can have a full life with food allergies, it may just be lived a little differently!